Hallucinations and Frittatas

People like to offer me their son’s hands in marriage. Unfortunately, I can never take them seriously.

When I was on my Psychiatry rotation, I did 2 weeks on Psych consults. Now, when most people think of psychiatry, they think of crazy people in a psych ward with soft padded walls. What you don’t realize is that you can only be in a psych ward if you have no other medical conditions, and that many of the drugs that we give patients to treat their medical conditions or relieve pain after surgery can cause “drug induced psychosis.”

Such was the case with one particular patient. For him, the drugs we had to give him to treat his condition had also induced a week of mania. He kept talking very quickly and kept professing his love to his entire medical team, to the point where he had to be restrained in bed to prevent him from constantly hopping out (and potentially injuring himself and others) to run down the hall and hug people.

He also thought that he was the King of England and was head of the United States Navy. I was offered the spot of Princess and my own ship.

The first time we entered his room, he made all of us line up so he could evaluate us, and then he pointed at me.

Patient: You!

Me (questioning): Me?

Patient: You are perfect for my son!

Me (confused): Me?

Patient: You will be a princess!

Me (surprised): Me?

Patient: And you will have both a husband and a ship!

Me (incredulous): Huh?

Patient: He is 35 and has never not failed at a relationship, but you’re going to be a doctor so you will be perfect. Besides, you will be a princess! And have your own ship!

Wife: Unfortunately, he’s not hallucinating about our son’s relationship issues. (to her husband) Honey, our son is 45. And he might have better dating luck if he didn’t still live at home with us or got a job.

We went through this on a daily basis until the son was finally there during one of our visits.

And the wife was totally correct in her assessment.

Meet the Parents Caprese Frittata

no oven required!


  • 10 in nonstick pan with lid
  • Olive oil spray
  • 10 grape tomatoes, chopped in half
  • 2-3 oz fresh mozzarella, diced to the same size as the tomatoes
  • 3 eggs
  • 2 tbsp pesto
  • 1 tbsp milk
  • Fresh-cracked Pepper
  • Salt


  1. Spray 10 inch pan with olive oil (put your own in a spray bottle- it’s healthier!)
  2. Place pan over medium-low heat. Add tomatoes.
  3. Mix together eggs, pesto, and milk. Add a few twists of fresh-cracked pepper.
  4. Pour egg mixture on top of tomatoes. Arrange pieces of mozzarella artfully across the dish (this might take 1-2 minutes, but that’s okay!).
  5. Cover with lid and cook for 5-7 minutes or until eggs are set.
  6. Slide out of pan, cut into wedges, and serve! Salt if desired (the addition of the pesto normally means you don’t need it)

Note: If you are using a 12-in pan, increase ingredients to 15 tomatoes, 3-4 oz mozzarella, 4 eggs, 3 tbsp pesto, and 2 tbsp milk. If your eggs are on the smaller size, increase by an additional egg.