You really never do know what is about to come out of someone’s mouth.
I was on a consult month and had just gotten a new patient. Now, I will admit that the feisty patients are some of my favorites- they really break up the day and are by far the most memorable.
This lady was FEISTY. I walked in and was immediately informed that she was doing things her way (as she always had, thank you very much). She also had an opinion on pretty much everyone.
Including, when we came back to formally round, my medical student.
At this point in time, I had a medical student with a very full beard. Which he liked to stroke as a nervous habit when he wasn’t talking.
That was what my patient picked up on immediately.
Attending: So, my dear, we would recommend…
Patient (interrupting): Oh, you a kinky devil, aren’t you?
Attending (shocked): Excuse me???
Patient (pointing at my medical student): You there, with the beard. You a kinky devil. You like stroking that beard. Man, you KINKY. You are so KINKY. STROKE that beard.
Medical student (shocked, but still nervously stroking his beard): Uhm, I don’t quite know what to say…
Patient (knowingly): Oh, you don’t need to say anything, you kinky devil.
Needless to say, we didn’t make him see that patient on a daily basis.
Devilish Strawberry and Black Pepper Jam
for the spicy side in you
4 c strawberries, hulled and mashed (I used about 2 packages of fresh strawberries)
- 7 c white sugar
- 1 pouch liquid pectin
- 2 tbsp black pepper, ground
- Prepare water bath canner with eight washed pint jars, rings, and lids.
- In your largest pot, mix together strawberries and sugar.
- Place strawberries and sugar over high heat and bring to a rolling boil (a boil you can’t stir down), stirring often (this easily can boil over the edge, so don’t walk away).
- Add liquid pectin all at once (it helps to cut the top off and have the container waiting upright in a drinking glass).
- Bring jam back to a rolling boil.
- Cook for 1 minute, stirring constantly, then turn off heat. Stir in black pepper. Add more to taste, if desired.
- Ladle jam into hot jars leaving 1/4 inch at the top. Wipe off rims then place on lids and rings.
- Place jars in water bath canner, bring water back to a boil, and process for 10 minutes.
- Remove jars and let cool for 12-24 hours. If jars not sealed within 24 hours, place in fridge and eat within a week.